luvdrunk's Blog

I have always been single
and probably will forever remain single
why?
because men are A$$holes.

I understand the whole concept of me against the world vs the world against me

and that change starts with self

but no matter how much you try to change yourself....
men will always be A$$holes.

so in December I injured my right knee after finally getting the motivation to work on my fitness.... the 'injury'  was bad enough that i couldnt walk for over 3 weeks but not bad enough for an orthopedic to find anything wrong with my knee..

anyways...

so it has rendered me not being able to do a lot of strenuous activity on my knee.....
 
Yesterday ,I decided to work on my upper body since my lower body isnt co operating...

and what do you know... while doing a side plank , i strained my shoulder...

so now , i cant lift anything over 2 pounds or raise my hand above my head  without  lots of pain 

conclusion : I am a good for nothing piece o sh!t ...

I've spent my saturday   icing my shoulder and rubbing anti inflammatory gels every 3 hours and trying not to move my hand but its almost impossible cos I'm right handed & i do everything with my right hand

Urg! 

what the hell was I put on earth for!

right now I am going through a phase.... i am fascinated with fitness 



 
and!
I just ate a piece of yummy bavarian almond cake...

get from this to that 

i look nothing like this woman but i like her transformation



source :  toneitup.com

so this past week I;ve been getting some phone calls from an unknown number.....

so i let it ring and go into voice mail the first few 100 times

finally today i picked up..... guess who.... dads friend... dont even ask me why this man has my number.

he calls for the purpose of asking me :::: " Do you miss daddy ?"  

THIS SH!T PISSES ME THE FU-K OFF!!!! LIKE NO OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you make a call from NYC to the fuc-kin caribbean to ask me ::::: "IF I MISS DADDY" ?


arrrrreeeee you outta your fu-kinnnnnnnnn mind a$$hole!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

god i hate stupid people, dont you have anything better to do.. I'm hating retired people right about now!

something is wrong with this ...... who does that!!!??????????????????????????????

its annoying. .. they! are annoying...

I should have mentioned to him what I found the other day... 

tonight i had my friend over and he went into my dads room looking for condoms..

the very first thing he found pen!s erectile drugs... lol 
i was a lil embarrassed cos my dads like 68yrs and also pretends to have this holier than thou attitude

Busted!!! Hes doing our neighbour for sure cos hes always by her house when ever her husband goes off to play golf.... doing what? now we know .

anywho.... I normally wouldnt give a shit but when u think youre all holy and insist I am the biggest sinner alive.. then it makes me want to expose your a$$...

i'm going to tell my sister tomorrow. shes going to be mortified by the thought but i cant keep this to myself.

well in a couple days time the dad will be off to Israel - to the holy land -  on his pretentious holy pilgrimage  trip 
he a stupid A$$wipe.... nicky minaj should sing about stupid A$$wipes


 ok .. back to havin a good time 

soup tonight.... going light today ..cos tomorrow i go hard 

going to fry an egg now.... ttyl

I've been eating the same thing 3 nights in a row... and i still have enough left for 2 more days. Dont worry , I packed it up in the freezer.... it will come in handy one of these days when i dont feel like cooking.

I bought blue berries for the first time today to try out. Its so expensive here  but tastes pretty good.. kinda tastes like grapes... anyways it will be the first and last time i buy them, just wanted to try them out.


tomorrow i start back eating rice.. I've had enough  mashed potatoes..

guess what i made again.... yup same thing

I collected my passport today , but when i took a look at the picture.. I cringed .
my face is the most hideous thing ever., no wonder i dont have a boyfriend and that no one is interested.

it makes me just want to hide away for the rest of my life so that no one will have to be disgusted , theres not one good feature.

I wont be passing on these horrible genes thats for sure, right now i dont even have a choice cos theres no one in this world that would want to be with me , so , its done.

there you have it folks only one of me and thats it.... the world will thank me for it later


you're welcome !

today was really boring. there was nothing to do and no where to go
all i did was eat , go on the net and sleep

breakfast this morning...

If you are ever  sunburnt and you can put your hands on an aloe plant... peel off the green skin and thorns throw it away  , take the clear flesh ,cut it up and rub it all over your burn several times for the day... it really works

 but the best cure is prevention... always remember to lather on the sun block. esp if you havent been in the sun for a while..

I've had my fair share of burning complete with blisters but aloe goo from the plant really helps me... instantly

or 
get a cold compress pack and use that

So , my bummed mood was getting the better of me so , I decided take things into my own hands and pre occupy myself.

I went to the beach. We had surprisingly very good weather and I was bored most of the time but enjoyed myslef for the most part.

Spent the day with friend :) at beach.. not the friend thats causing me grief of the heart.

So while relaxing..... my celly rings.. guess who

my dads friend from new york - people hes staying by right now on his vacation...
(i rang him yesterday and i was pissed because he had a 5 min conversation with me about how he thinks hes dying and wanted to let me know where his gold chain was hidden... which i was very uninterested to say the least) to shut him up i told him : "youre fine and nothing is going to happen to you.. just enjoy your vacation"
so anyway the friend of his asked me if i was missing my dad.. and I dont want to seem like a total b!tch to people so i say - of coarse!! so then he replies... "well we are coming home on a fight tomorrow"

my heart dropped cos i was like Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo not tomorrow!!!!!!

so i was like -why what happened to dad?-... and he laughs and tells me ... he's just kidding.

I didnt think it was funny cos I just dont.

like who does that !? weirdos!! and people say i'm weird. 

fu=k! the last person I want to call me is my dad when i'm on the beach relaxing.. its my get away ... not a place where i want to be pissed off

feeling so bummed today...
I'm not liking the way i look. 

i finished cleaning and yet i still feel so unfulfilled...

is it that i didnt clean enough!?  i cleaned all the most important surfaces from top to bottom that were bothering me the most. and now that they are all cleaned.. . I feel sad.

sad that I dont have a man , sad that i dont have friends ... sad about my body 

this is so depressing, my life is not at all what i wanted it to be.

yet what am i doing about it..... nothing .. not one damn thing

got up early this morning to go down to the office to collect my passport but when i got there they said they couldnt give it to me cos the systems were down.
 
stupid people wasted my time! I live far from this place and drove a long lonely drive up there too

then i went to the bank and there was this super long line and had to wait for an hour there before i could pay 1 bill

 good grief...

 and then when i got home i just couldnt stop replaying... how he said he loved her 

 yuk

so i went online and saw all these wonderful things that i wanted and felt like doing a little retail therapy ... for a while it got me real excited but then i thought about how broke i would be if i were to get all the things...
then i got sad again.....

I'll go clean and polish the floors and try not to think about it.

I honestly feel like crying

My knee feels much better so i was thinking about walking but at the same time... my neighbour pulls up and tells me to be careful if i have to go out at night because the other guys who live next to him got robbed ...
some fellas pulled up with some guns, snatched their chains and came inside and took their x box and other stuff....

sigh.. what is this place coming to..

 

 

already discovered....

Some A$$holes are not to be trusted..

I have some luck with men! wow

I feel a little hurt.. cos I think I expect too much  or something
its bad that i even expect at all.

times like these .. i could do with some sun or a nice run to relieve some stress....

but its been raining a lot and well u know why I can run.


I lied .I feel A LOT hurt.

its ok, I'll get over it.  - I cant even count the amount of times I've told myself that - 

I am free .. I mean my mind is at peace


I'm loving it . every second of it 


cos i know this is an opportunity that doesnt come by very often.

dropped the father off to the airport 4 am. but was up since 3.30am , didnt go to bed till 12.30 am  and when i returned home  ,i wasnt tired.... all i wanted to do was clean and do laundry ,so I did
the house is very quiet, just the way i like it :) 
I'm happy 

its a nice day out today too.. wish the beach was in my back yard but its not so oh well.

i dont have groceries  and i dont wanna buy anything to eat... i have bread and a couple eggs.. I'll make that for dinner i guess. 

the bad thoughts are overwhelming and getting the better of me/

i'm not supposed to be doing this

I'm supposed to be on a detox.... cleansing of the mind and spirit 

but I am WEAK!

I cant seem to control it today

theres a lot of hate still in my heart and Its not a good day today

I'm doing really bad.